V-day

After Christmas nd New Year, another occasion comes along - an occasion when roses and chocolates become a prime commodity; when restos and movie houses become fully booked; and when it's all sweet talk - Valentines Day.

Each year is a unique celebration for me -- regardless if that year I'm single or in a relationship. But this year, it's even more unique, because I'll just be at home on this day. Since it fell on a Sunday and Chinese New Year, surely, most of the peeps will be outdoors. And because of this, might as well stay at home cause I don't want to harass myself with the thought of how to reserve seats in a resto or how to walk freely in malls. Another thing, some of my friends or close colleagues start to be in a relationship one after the other. Obviously, they would go out as couples and I wouldn't want to end up the 3rd wheel or the one they'll just ask out of pity cause I'm still single. Well, being single isn't something that shouldn't be pitied at.

There are is something that I just find odd: the way some people celebrate this day. Some treat V-day like Christmas -- expecting or giving gifts nd partying, or wallow nd loathe this day. To each his own, true enough. But this day shouldn't be treated as a day to be on the materialistic side. Let's all be reminded that St. Valentine is the patron saint of love and not of a significant other. Therefore, it's a day to celebrate love not a lover. Regardless if we are in the sweetness high or hurting or healing mode, it's the feeling and acting love towards other people [family, friends, loved ones, countrymen or God] that we commemorate.

So whether you are married, in a relationship, divorced, it's complicated or single, thank the Lord for the feeling of love given to us -- which is the reason that keeps us going. And never stop sharing and giving love to make this world a better place.

Happy V-day to all ^_^

a mother's love...

I'm used to keeping it to myself, but only when I got older that I believe I'm closer to my mom. Mothers will always be the emotional pillar of the family members. No wonder that many would agree with me, when children got something in mind, they approach their mothers more than their fathers. Plus, it's always been proven that a mother's love is unconditional -- like Jesus and Mother Mary. But to what extent that does a mother's love have to be revealed to their children?

Days ago, it's all in the news that a certain person named Jason Ivler was being arrested for a double murder case said to be committed out of traffic issues. He was being searched for months already but nowhere to be found. His mother, Marlene Aguilar [sister of famous singer - Freddie Aguilar], kept insisting that his son is not with her. But just days ago, it was found out that her son was just hiding in her house in Blue Ridge Subdivision. And instead of cooperating with the police authorities, her son kept fighting by shooting the NBI officials. And at present, she kept saying she believes her son is innocent of the crimes accused to Jason Ivler.

True enough, anybody is considered innocent until proven guilty by law or proper judgment. But c'mon, loving someone doesn't mean that his mistakes have to be tolerated in a way. In love or relationships, we should accept and embrace a person's imperfections. But, there is also such a thing as rules and regulations we abide as citizens. We are responsible to those. As human beings as well, we have to deal with our neighbors properly and respect. Not by hurting or killing them. The fact that Jason killed not once "but twice" [in the mala-Susan Roces angry tone...haha], he has to suffer the consequence of his actions. I completely understand it hurts that her son will soon separate from her in the prison cell, but imagine the two families who lost a loved one, they can never hug their dead loved ones in the grave anymore.

To the moms out there, I understand your sentiments. I've never been a mom yet so this shouldn't come from me. Sincerely, I appreciate your love for your children, no questions about it. But if you really love your children, you have to give them wings to fly. Giving them the wings to fly would mean making them realize that doing good would reap them blessings and doing mistakes or crimes would result to consequences they have to learn. In loving, we really have to get hurt.

In short, do love your children, don't spoil them. Why? When the mothers die, what will happen to them next if the children depend so much on you?...

all hail 20-10

might have been a bit delayed...but it's still January so...

Manigong Bagong Taon sa Pilipino!!! Bonne Annee in French!!! Happy New Year in English!!!

quick quick Q & A's to start off the year 20-10...

new year's resolution/s: blog more... more positive thinking [whoa...this will be difficult]... less procrastination...take good care of my health religiously

prayers for 20-10: good health for my family, prosperity with career, positive change for the country, from single-hood to in-a-relationship [ok..this is my blog right?^_^]

something new to learn: use the steering wheel properly [drive, that is!!!]
taking pics non-pro but a little bit artsy
a water sport

my contribution for the country: volunteerism and vote this elections!!!

target destinations for 20-10: another unique Asian country trip and an Pinas island getaway...more than two would definitely be awesome ^_^

wishin' concerts [crossing fingers]: Alicia Keys, Justin...Timberlake [haha...kala nyo Bieber noh...] and more R&B concerts and of course, Davids -- Cookie and Archie: the brotherhood concert...woohoo^_^

physical changes: get some braces finally!!!

goal for 20-10: accomplish these one at a time ^_^

wish for 20-10: <3 love love love...with less hesitations <3

and more changes to go, 20-10 is just beginning anyway^_^

not that bad...but not the best...

Finally, after months of just telling myself I will watch a movie, I did. Along with my friend Abie, we watched "New Moon" no matter what...

Honestly, I'm not a huge fan of Stephanie Mayer or anything to do with vampires, but I read the "Twilight" series, I just got the hang of it. It was a fad in our office a year ago and now it was finally interpreted in the big screen.

No wonder, the publicity and exposures of Robert Pattinson [who plays Edward] and Kristin Stewart [who plays Bella] brought huge clamor for the public to get too curious to watch the movie. Adding up a new character, Jacob Black [played by Taylor Lautner], brought a little spice to the plot. I would say "New Moon" is better than the first one, "Twilight". Forgive me, but I was really pissed with the first one cause of it's poor cinematography and interpretation. Watching the first 5 minutes and I really wanted to go home, but I just don't want to make my money flush down the drain...Sad to say, it did...

As always, don't expect too much for movies based on book adaptations because you'll end up with disappointments. C'mon guys, it's just common sense that books can't be turned into movies in every nitty gritty detail or we'll all end up in movie houses for days. I would suggest that treat it as if you've never read the book or if you really can't help it, don't watch it.

Overall, it's better but not the best that I've watched...I would say that is the last movie I have watched in the big screen for 20-0-9...More to watch, but that will be next year already...Holidays are just eating my "me" time...

state of mind...

Thoughts run faster than a speeding bullet...A single action or word or feeling could lead to a thousand thoughts and judgments from different people...That's how the power of God is really amazing...

Ask me now and my thoughts this second could be a different one in a matter of hours...

Half crazy...
Excited for the holidays...
Missing someone or more than one...
and there's so much more...no wonder I blog...hehe^_^

But what if your thoughts, your state of mind, suddenly turns into an awesome song...It made me hum and sing and all giddy excited even more...



Well...singer / songwriter Alicia Keys makes good music...just like David Archuleta...and now I'm anticipating all the more to get a copy of her album "Elements of Freedom", in stores on Dec 15...

*source: www.aliciakeys.com*

a basic need that shouldn't be wasted...

Days ago, it was all in the news that UN [United Nations] mentioned that there are around 1 billion people all over the world who are suffering from hunger. It is neither a joke nor an announcement to the public just to inform...

I'm sure we are aware of our surroundings that there are beggars in the streets, financially challenged people who struggle everyday to survive. It's just that we ignore or we don't seem to care. Yes, me and my family work for a living but not just for food alone...I admit, there are times I ignore this issue because I don't feel what's it like to work so hard not for buying luxuries or material things but just to eat. And that is the effect to the rest of us who are financially capable [if not really filthy rich], we tend to be complacent and not thinking of other people but ourselves.

What makes this issue of hunger worse are the people who don't care and at the same time, who don't eat wisely or properly. I admit again, I used to buy food before in big servings or get food filling up the plate in parties and end up not finishing them up. But years ago, when I had a heartache that caused me to eat one meal a day only [yes, you read it "one meal" only] for months, that became the turning point for me to learn the value of food. When I got back to my normal eating routine [breakfast-snack-lunch-snack-dinner], it isn't just about filling up my stomach but realizing that I have to give my best not to waste whatever food is placed on my plate. Having food trips with family or friends as past time, I feel bad when I so much leftovers going on with the plates/food packages in restos or fastfood chains. It's not because I wanna eat them all up but because I know there are a lot of people getting really hungry everyday --- hungry because they can't afford to buy even a piece of bread. Those leftovers couldn't have been leftovers but rather have ended up being shared to the rest of the world. And the hungry wouldn't end up eating leftovers but rather healthy and fresh meals. Plus, it isn't easy to keep going and working if a person skips a meal. Been there, felt that -- I used to skip meals during my high school and college days just to finish an assignment or project and I ended up being acidic and diagnosed with gastritis [which I have in me for life...].

Actually, there are ways how to end up with less leftovers of food...They may not bring out big results but collaborated little efforts per person could contribute soon with the hunger situation the world is going through at the moment...Let me share just a few of those...

1. Plan what you want to eat -- There are those who make abrupt decisions on what to eat. The result: They can't finish up the food or they are forced to finish it until they end up with the vomit feeling.

** Before falling in line to order or before calling a waiter to take the order, plan first what meal you can finish up then decide which is your crave to eat. In short, don't order by impulse.

2. Eat in groups -- This is if you'll be eating out with friends. Instead of ordering individual meals / plates, order a "to-share" or a meal good for how many persons. You don't just lessen the chances of leftovers but you also spend less. Just make sure to ask first the resto's meals if they're good for how many persons.

3. Take out what's left -- Ok, I know some wouldn't appreciate this tip, but really, this might help. Of course, this will be based on your judgment. Take note of two considerations: if there was so much left on the plates and if they wouldn't spoil easily even if you take them home.

** If you're in a resto, you can ask the waiter to have the food wrapped for take out while asking for your bill to pay. If you're in a fast food chain, simply ask for a plastic or container at the counter.

NOTE: Do this if you're with your family and friends or if you're with someone comfortable. Of course, don't do it on special functions or events you're attending.

4. Know your eating ritual or habit -- In this way, you would know how much you should eat per meal. Honestly, this was one of the things I did that changed a few of my eating rituals. I'm not saying this for you guys to be on diet. I'm NOT ON A DIET =)

** Try to observe how much you eat per meal for a week. If you end up having leftovers often for that entire week, try to lessen your servings week after week. If writing it down would help, then do so.

NOTE: Again, this is not to make you guys stop eating but to lessen leftovers, meaning you will end up finishing up your food without ending up vomiting.

5. Learn to say "NO" -- As simple as it is...

If somebody offers you food even if you're full, don't hesitate to say NO...It's more shameful if you end up biting from a big piece of bread or only consuming a spoonful from an entire plate, just because you don't want the one who offered to feel bad...We can say some negative things in an honest yet positive tone, if we would want to.

Well, my intention of posting this is not for you guys to feel bad or pity while eating. The purpose is to make each one of us realize that hunger isn't a petty problem. It increases each year. Let's not wait for the future generations to experience this at its worst. I'm sure each government all over the world is putting its best efforts to minimize this, but in our little ways we should realize and work as one than just aware-then-ignore. For now, we only have one world, so let's utilize our need -- FOOD -- properly.

reasons to celebrate in November...

Some say that November is considered a lonely month because here in the Philippines, November 1 and 2 are days when we visit the cemeteries and pay respects to our dead loved ones. But, who says it isn't a month to celebrate and have fun as well?...For the inner teenage that I still have even if I'm twenty-ish [haha...got that from a commercial], let me give reasons to celebrate:

1. birthday overloads...

High School friends: Doc Gemma, Nurse Shengky [who's got a new bf now...woot], Events Organizer Michelle
Former Officemates/Friends: O.C Abie [Ate Abie...hehe], Eastwood City Godfather Sir Rhoel [haha...necessary title daw yan]
My Godchild: Hami [Hannah Mikaela]
New Friendship-Fellow David Archie Fan: Larissa [i prefer to call her..."the lucky one"...haha *kidding*]

2. Archuleta Philippines 1st yr Anniversary =)
-- we wouldn't be updated and Archie-loving some more if it wasn't for the updates from the peeps here ^_^

3. Ninang [Godmother] to be again
-- 5 all in all..but will be turning 6 godchildren cause my cousin's son will add up to my list...

4. One of my close friend is engaged
-- she's engaged to her long distant German boyfriend...congrats Kristal =)
ps. another wedding?!...haaayzzz...when's my turn? if it's possible lang naman...haha...anyway, never mind =)

5. Starbucks-sticker-collecting-for-a-planner time again [no need to explain]

6. New designs of clothes...cause SALE is over for most malls...haha *bitchy*

7. 2012, New Moon...and new movies that I can watch soon [thank you God for the new opportunity^_^]

8. Bonifacio Day [another holiday] at the end of the month
-- ah ehem Carla, that is if your new workplace is affected with a Philippine holiday?!...haha...

9. New Job and Environment...
-- just starting so I can't conclude that much yet...but at the moment, it's a reason to celebrate too right?!

10. all about David Archuleta -- his Christmas from the Heart album, his US Christmas tour, his posts on magazines nd everything David Archie [should I really elaborate this further???!!!...haha...hell no^_^]

11. and that after this month, it's Christmas season and closing 20-0-9...new year, new chapter...woohoo ^_^

Advance Maligayang Pasko [Merry Christmas] at Manigong Bagong Taon [Happy New Year] to everyone!!! Let's make this month count...12 months wouldn't be 12 if it wasn't for one of them which is November ^_^

make yourself count...

Months away from now and it'll be 2010. Next year will be a significant year for our country as we make a change by going through the 2010 Presidential Elections. I got a text message from a person close to me saying that he is finally a registered voter for next year's elections. He's excited to be able to exercise his right to vote and contribute to the country's history.

Sincerely, I'm happy for him because he really loves the Philippines. He is a very patriotic individual in words and actions. I seriously admire him even more for that. Congratulations...you are one true proud Pinoy. Kudos to you =)

I may not be very vocal about my thoughts on politics as I always say, but I'm excited to vote one more time and make my voice count for this country. I've been a registered voter years ago and it's gonna be my 3rd time to vote next year. But, whatever happens soon and whoever is placed in the highest position in the land, I will never tire of voting and making 1 vote bring a change to this nation.

So for those who aren't registered yet [who should be...], c'mon guys, STAND UP AND BE COUNTED. DON'T WASTE TIME...REGISTER NOW at the nearest Comelec office in your area...It's only until Oct. 31, 2009 =)

answered prayer...

Sometimes, when one feels sooo down and sooo empty, that's when something strange happens...A strange yet good thing happens, unexpectedly...

Finally, my weeks of being a home buddy and crazy pessimism are soon to be over...

What I feel right now is gratitude, happiness and excitement...

This 1 month of depression, anxiety and self-pity will just be a thing of the past...

Grateful that I learned a lot from this period of my life...In this day and age, it isn't easy to find a job. Moreover, it isn't easy to be jobless (except if you are more financially capable and blessed). Humility is accepting that you have got true strengths and weaknesses all mixed up in your life. Nobody is perfect and nobody is higher than the Creator. But, we are given the capacities that set us apart from everybody else.

When I was at the lowest point of my emotions and every time tears shed from my eyes, I took refuge of the Supreme Being and suddenly I feel better...

Now I got my answered prayer...Sometimes, the answer is simply within your reach...We just either let it pass or we don't seem to notice...

Now, the tears are simply tears of joy -- joy of going through a new beginning, a better beginning...

song for the day: Don't Stop Believin' -- Journey / Glee Soundtrack

happy 1st birthday c'est la vie!!!!

With so much things going around, I almost forgot...It's been a year already since I started blogging here in BLOGGER-slash-BLOGSPOT --- October 3 to be exact...

I've been writing since I was a student...So that's more than 10 years ago...And when this BLOG-MANIA started, I worked my way to share my life and everything about life.

But in this side of the website, I was not only able to share my life but I was able to entertain and inform friends, colleagues and passerby-readers...

So, expect more stories to share...more thoughts to keep you informed...more emotions to make you realize a lot...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my BLOG!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY "C'est La Vie"!!!

Thanks to all the readers I've touched in my little ways and words!!! More years to come ^_^

the aftermath...

It's sunny now here in my place...But some places are still in rehabilitation...

As of today, Sept 29, 2009, a lot of organizations are still accepting donations and packing relief goods for the rest of our fellow Filipinos who are still in evacuation centers and flooded. The flooded areas have already subsided...and what's left...

ruined houses, houses and hard-earned owned materials with mud...

Just gonna leave here a few short messages about this...Honestly, I may not be deeply affected but I am saddened cause this was not an expected fate for our country...

1. To those who wanna help, try to check websites like abs-cbn.com and gmanews.tv for the list of organizations you could participate in to send donations or volunteer. You could also check superbianca.blogspot.com [blog site of Ms. Bianca Gonzales -- tv host personality] and @Magic899 [twitter of Magic 89.9 -- radio station here in Manila] for other list of groups. Twitter is also a great avenue right now to raise your concerns regarding info on ways to help.

2. Speaking of Twitter, I've read a few who are spreading tweets on how to help and sharing their sentiment...Of course our fellow Pinoy celebrities and to the ff: Demi Moore, Shontelle and Demi Lovato (cause these were the few I've seen...I'm sure there are more international artists tweeting about it)...Thank you =)

3. To those who were hit badly by the aftermath, I know I may not be one of those who could alleviate the pain but I'll keep you guys in my prayers that the country will be able to survive and continue to live one day at a time...

4. To my officemates, friends and loved ones, I hope you are all doing well now...I'm sure this incident isn't a good one and it's painful to see that you're hard-earned stuff are just washed away, but keep in mind that everything happens for a reason and in losing, we realize the bare essentials in life.

We'll all be well soon...Keep the faith everyone...

xoxo,
Calai

song for the day: Heal the World - Michael Jackson

bittersweet and blessed...

Back from the ruins...

Yesterday, Sept 25, 2009 was another tragic event that made the country united in efforts and in prayers...Typhoon "Ondoy" hit Luzon, went away now and obviously, left sooo many traces -- flooded areas, destroyed houses, homeless and evacuated people and deaths.

After the storm, I'm thankful that me and my family are intact. We just ended up having no electricity for one day and a few hours. As I went to church this afternoon, it made me even more thankful and blessed that our family was ok. Despite that, the pain is sinking in to me at the moment because the rest of the country -- those who were hit hard by the storm -- are still in the process of being saved.

Our country may have been left with bad traces, but this made us see that Filipinos can always come together and unite for their fellowmen. A lot are volunteering to rescue and donating material needs for those who badly need at the moment.

I won't prolong this further...I still feel that even if I'm ok now, I don't deserve to splurge so much at the moment...If you would like to help in the least possible way you can, you can check on these two websites how:

abs-cbnews.com
gmanews.tv

"Lord, thank You...and I pray for those who still need help right now, please keep them under the mantle of Your protection and love..."

all the while i thought im the only one...

It's been a week already since I bummed out from work...Thankful that I get to have good night sleeps for the past few days and catch up on some of the things I missed [watching tv and reading books]...But of course, I can't be like this forever...I still have to do something relevant to keep up with the personal finances and my family's needs.

Anyway, I don't know but I think God is really making little miracles for me not to give up...I came across this website that I've always wanted to submit an article on and then, I saw this post...Guys, read this until the end for you to completely understand...The writer and I have a few similarities on this story, but that's not exactly the point...Here it is...

Youngblood

Out of here
By Anna Veniza R. Arcilla

Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 02:10:00 09/12/2009

Filed Under: Employment

Soon I will be leaving the company that has been my home for two years and nine months. The idea of leaving has been giving me nightmares, but I know this is what I really want.

When I first joined the company, I was an idealistic neophyte who believed that as long as I was doing my job, no problems would arise. I was happy with the company, and it became a second home for me. I gained friends and even won their respect and loyalty. I developed feelings for someone who turned out to be a womanizer (the feeling lasted for only one month), and now he is my ka tropa. I fell seriously for an IT guy with a wide forehead (who just got promoted recently), and now we are kind of “MU” (mutual understanding) after two years of waiting. And I was able to save enough money for some of my future plans.

Months passed. New people were hired, and trained. Some old co-workers got promoted and some left for reasons I could not comprehend at first.

Then it suddenly dawned on me that something was wrong with the situation. There were nice people who got promoted and began sprouting horns on their heads. There were others who were already bad even before they were hired and they were spreading discontent and havoc.I saw a couple of my fellow workers crying because a monster of a manager had screamed at them. Even as tears continued to flow from their swollen eyes, they were still checking documents and searching for errors, no matter how hard it was to focus on the computer screen.

I saw my pregnant friend crying because a satanic manager was cursing her online. Another friend was humiliated by a moody manager when she filed for a leave of absence.

I reacted violently when the company decided to increase our salaries based on our rating system. A nice manager had given a neophyte a grade of 4+ (even if he was still committing a lot of errors) while another manager gave an experienced worker a grade of 2 (even though she was one of the best employees). The neophyte received a P1,700 salary increase and the latter got a P300 increase. Was that fair?

I learned that when somebody got promoted, it meant he had stepped on someone else, like crabs in a basket. I also learned that an employee is only an employee, and no matter how long he has been in the company and how hard he has been working, he still remains just an employee—without a voice, without the right to talk or to question things, and with the duty to follow and act dumb.

I am not saying this because I feel bitter. Bitter over what? Because I have never been promoted even if I have put all my energies into my work? Because I sacrificed time for my family so I could render overtime work in compliance with orders of my superiors? When my mom died in a hospital, I didn’t know about it until my shift was over because we were not allowed to bring cell phones into the work area.

It is every worker’s dream to be promoted because it means receiving a salary higher as well as some perks and privileges. But in this company, I cannot even dream of being promoted because that won’t change anything. Instead it will give the people above you another excuse to bully you.

I know that I am sounding like a spoiled brat, sulking over things I cannot have. But sometimes you need to act like a brat so that you will get what you really want. And now all I want is a work place that will be a true second home for me.

So, I had this plan of leaving, and a plan to find a replacement. Then I told my boss that I was quitting.

Two of the best managers of our department talked to me and told me they were happy with my decision. They understood and they knew how I felt. They seemed actually to share my relief as I was telling them about my decision.

Friends are asking me what made me quit. I tell them there is life after work, and that I need my life back. I need to slow down and assess my life and feel free for a while. And my only regret is that I didn’t do it earlier. I’m not running from the things that make me apply excessive eye liner and eye shadow to express my anger, I just want to clear my mind and know who I really am.

Now I realize that working hard is not enough to make one happy on the job. Some things aren’t good as what we want to be. I know that by leaving, I can learn things other than what I know now. I am not dumb, and I don’t want to be forever following black witches’ orders.

I used to be a kind, soft-spoken girl with an understanding heart, but now I am completely the opposite. I came to the point of looking at life as if it’s a curse. I don’t want myself to continue hating life.

I want the old me but I want to bring with me the things I learned. This place has made me strong. It taught me to be thankful for living a simple life, simple yet happy. It also made me realize that I miss my family and friends.

My father told me that I should look for a new job where I can be happy and which will not take me far from them. He reminded me that they had taught me and my siblings to believe that simplicity spells happiness. Who am I to disagree?

When I go, I will be leaving behind the people who have been nice to me. But this is a small world and I know we will bump into each other again and again. And there is Facebook and Friendster to help us stay in touch. As for the IT guy, he will still be there, texting me every night.

(Anna Veniza R. Arcilla, 26, is a graduate of Jose Rizal University with a Bachelor of Commercial Science Major in Management degree.)

To my former officemates, I think you might have the idea about how is this article related to me...But to the rest of my readers, this is an eye-opener...On how you'll take this? Well, I just hope with an open mind and heart, as what I am doing at this present stage in my life.

source: inquirer.net

first things first...

I am days away till I say "ciao" and head off to a new chapter of my career life...And as I head off to that new journey, I'd better have that list of what-to-do's and get rid of the limbo state...

1. Clean the house and de-clutter...DEFINITELY!!!...
-- sad to say, I'm the only one working on that errand at home...tsktsk...
2. Throw away old, unnecessary stuff...and re-organize my files and my room...WHEW!!!
-- this will take more than a day...
3. Work on stuff that can make me earn a few for the time being...
-- NO FURTHER ELABORATIONS FOR NOW...but IT WILL SURELY BE POSTED FOR POTENTIAL CLIENTS4. Catch up on reading books, new songs and watching DVD's...YES PLEASE!!!

5. Eat and sleep...in ample amounts...6. Submit applications...JUST IN CASE...
7. Learn something new, creative stuff...HMMM, LETS KEEP OUR FINGERS CROSSED ON THIS...HAHA
8. Lastly, say my little prayers of thanksgiving and strength to keep going and move forward to better things in my so-called life...
WHATEVER HAPPENS IN BETWEEN THESE...I PRAY IT'S FOR THE BEST...
Before, I used to do what's just normal and complacent...First things first, it's about time I do some things till I get to what I love, one step at a time...

song for the day: One Step at a Time - Jordin Sparks

don't stop...hold on...

when you feel sick and tired of the negative things going on with your life...

when you feel that you have cried so much that your eyes are drying up...

when you feel that one loud and long scream is what you need to release the tensions inside your heart...

when you feel there's no detour in the road you're taking...

when you feel it's time to stop...

that's when something comes up and makes us realize that we shouldn't get sick and tired...that's when little miracles come along the way...that's when God tells us there's no reason for you to push yourself lower the pit...

The past few weeks was the lowest period of my year. I know it's a breather that after 5 long years I'm taking my career path to a different direction. But, seeing that I might end up in limbo state -- not knowing where I'd head next or not having a new job yet to replace -- is really depressing. For some, it might not be a major problem. For some, the decision I made could be a mistake. But if this mistake will be a way for me to learn and stand up again, I'm taking the challenge...

All of a sudden, from all my depressions and stresses of where I'll be heading next, a stop to think and pray was all I needed to keep me going again. When I stopped and cried out my all in my room, that's when I realized there's still so much more awaiting for me. This financial-problem-phase will just be temporary. That's when the other options and little miracles came to me. My family who never stopped believing I could still get a better job this time kept telling me to keep going. My friends who never ceased to remind me that this is just temporary. They have been sending messages to me of support and of options what to do for the meantime, instead of giving me the blame.

Honestly, I don't need reprimands at the moment because I know where my fault line is already. I should have made this decision before and I should have not made a thing or two opportunities pass before...But read this, "THAT WAS BEFORE"...I'm in for the next stage of my life -- get a new job here in the country or abroad or better yet, make this small business work. I've had enough of the crying and the depression. The stress already made me physically sick -- SO THAT'S REALLY ENOUGH. I've put myself down, made mistake but now, I'm gonna keep going and aim to get to where I should be.

So to those who have or are still pessimistic like I was weeks ago, I can't be too prophetic here...Don't worry too much [my friends were right...]...And when you feel you're gonna breakdown into the bottomless pit, pray...PRAY HARDER...AND DON'T QUIT...

Let me leave this quotation that I've always kept in mind the moment I saw this in Nike store in Greenbelt [haha...just in case you are curious to check]

"DON'T STOP WHEN YOU'RE TIRED, STOP WHEN YOU'RE DONE"...

PS. Let me leave as well my song-slash-video for the weeks to come [in memories from the Archuleta and Cook Live in Manila]...I just can't help it cause it's still in my memory and I love this song...enjoy^_^

My Hands - David Archuleta

calai for a weekend^_^

"simply we'll remember, while we're dancing in September..." and yesss...IT IS SEPTEMBER!!!

Here in the Philippines, Christmas season starts in this month. For some strange reason, radio stations play a few Christmas songs already. Christmas decos will be in the streets and establishments in the weeks to come...

But since I don't feel that excited to celebrate it just yet, how was my long weekend??? Hmmm...

1. A lunch treat, text messages, attending the Mass and a surprise phone call I made for Nabil and Izza -- all on that Saturday. The phone call lasted for 7 minutes but it was a fun one. How I wish it could have been longer or how I wish it was more than a phone call...

2. Home errands, food craving and chats with friends on a Sunday...Having dinner and long talks with friends don't happen everyday, especially now.

First stop was a Mexican foodie at Mexicali. I've been missing to eat TACOS my love for quite sometime already...wooohooo...


Then, a sweet deal and more chats at Red Mango...and I must say, I love the place. It's all in the blogosphere on how people love to keep coming back here. They've got yogurts where you can choose your own toppings for it. They also got smoothies, waffles and coffee. Definitely, it's my new crave!!!



3. Well, for the NTH time, I've been telling myself I'm gonna watch the movie "UP"...and finally I did...It's not just a cartoon *kiddie-giddy* stuff. It's for all ages. It isn't just a movie about a house that was lifted by tons of balloons. It was more than that...It reminded me of my grandparents on how they loved each other. It's about loving others in general.

And another, one of the heads in making this movie was a Filipino...He was featured in the local news days ago...So, there's a dash of Pinoy pride in me that made me watch this movie...It's nice to know that there are Filipinos working in Pixar... *applause*applause* ^_^


And to cap off my night, I went to a parlor owned by one of my choirmates, Ate Rose. The place is called Zamyu...so if there are Pasiguenos reading this blog site, check out her parlor -- It's in Kapasigan...


After 48 years [hehe...not quite], I finally had my hair shorter...I used to have long hair for the past 5 years already. Sometimes, we try stick to what we have and are afraid to get out of our comfort zone simply because we are afraid of what we're gonna end up afterwards...This time around, I've been so negative lately, it's time I start making a change beginning with the way I look...It brings out a different feeling and the motivation starts to get going...AGAIN...Thanks to those who gave me good compliments for my new 'do...And don't worry, this will grow long again in time...For now, I'm just loving and embracing it...

**song for the day:::::> Jesus Take the Wheel -- Carrie Underwood / Danny Gokey ^_^**

to keep it short and sensible...

it's another Monday holiday...

i won't keep this a bit long cause i want to spend this holiday well...

just want to post this shoutout...

to all my Malaysian friends, Happy Merdeka Malaysia!!!

and to every Filipino, Happy National Heroes Day!!!

lastly,,,one sleep to go...it's BER month once again...SEPTEMBER!!!

the start of the longest Christmas celebration...here in the Philippines!!! haha^_^

can't feel that at the moment, hopefully, soon i would...

defining a hero...

Back in the days, I used to learn that heroes are only those what we only see in History books and monuments because they are already dead. They could be considered heroes because they die to protect their country/territory from foreign invaders.

But what really defines a hero???

A quote goes "Heroes are not born, they are made." Well, true enough, God knows each one's fate already, but the person himself knows that he needs to work on sculpting his own life.

A hero...

doesn't have to be rich or famous to be one...
doesn't have to make a drastic change...Big things come from small beginnings...
doesn't have to die just to be considered one...While alive, the person can be recognized already and given the tribute he deserves...
doesn't have to be in war...Ammunition or weapons aren't necessary; Having the armors like good intentions, charity and peace can go places...

can be somebody or everybody...It can be your parents who work damn hard to provide you good education...It can be your teacher who provides you knowledge every single day...It can be a neighbor who extends his help for household repairs...It can be a church server who shares the goodness and words of God, making you realize how the Supreme Being is so essential...It can be an office mate you can rely on during your financial needs...It can be a friend who kept cheering and pacifying you to go on life and never lose hope and faith...

It can be YOU who would start loving their country by taking the initiative to vote...It can be YOU who would start making a change by joining groups with the advocacy to help their needy fellowmen...It can be YOU...

Again, heroes are not born, they are made...It's National Heroes' Day...Let's take pride and give gratitude to those who gave their lives just for our country's freedom...and to those who are still with us giving their very best to make the Philippines and the world a better place to live in...

mid-week breakdown...

Besides the fact that I'm having a headache today, I'm starting to feel my so-called "MID-WEEK BREAKDOWN"...

Sad to say, there's no pill that I can swallow to cure me at the moment...

It's been weeks already that I've been feeling this way...Honestly, I know I made a better choice...I chose to have a better career and financial path...But as the days and weeks pass, I start to get worried about how will I end up...

I know that some of the people, who came in and left to choose the same decision I just made, are doing better now...My mind is saying I can, but my heart and spirit are feeling weak...Day by day, getting rejections or no responses from the few that I've submitted sickens me already...In addition, I am on the family pressure that I need to get a replacement [from the choice I made] because I need to help them for us to survive...My head's rambling thoughts right now that I can utilize my plans properly...One thing sure at the moment, I can make our needs for survival but not to be superbly rich...I dream to have a family of my own too, you know...

Few of my friends keep giving me reasons not to give up and be positive that some good things would turn out soon...Some, in fact, say that the power of prayers do help...But, sometimes, I know it isn't right, but I start to question if is there really a right prayer formula for success??? Do I have to cry so hard just for me to be heard??? Maybe, I'm just pessimistic and impatient...because I know my days are numbered too...Still, thanks to you guys for not giving up on me...

I just don't want to listen to those who would keep asking me, what's gonna happen next for me??? Or some thing like, am I sure of my decision??? Effing...YES I AM SURE...I'm taking the risk than staying confined in a rut of not doing something I would love to do...I'm willing to the take the risk of being in another place to fulfill my passions...

I just don't want to think about worrying what I'll end up for a day...

I just want to finally get the improvement I deserve -- hopefully in a better place...

I just want to take a hiatus from this negativity...

DEAR LORD, they say that good things come to those who wait and have faith...With Your guidance and blessings, keep me intact...Bless me for the good things to finally come to prosper one after the other...I don't know what to do anymore...I've been working on it, but still You are the Provider...You are the only source...

**song for the week: My Hands - David Archuleta**

the essence of beauty contests...

Gone were the days when I used to dream that one day I could join beauty contests. The years passed when I used to be an avid excited viewer of prestigious beauty contests just like the one yesterday, Miss Universe 2009. Not because I can't join but because I guess I have outgrown that fanaticism already. I remember the last time I got soooo excited to watch it was way back in 1999, when Miriam Quiambao was close to winning the Philippines' 3rd Miss Universe title. She won 1st place that time.

Among 83 participants all over the world, the title was won by another South American -- for two straight years -- Miss Venezuela.

It's kind of odd that lately, the countries winning these competitions have interpreters during Question and Answer portions. Well, I'm not sour-graping guys. I just think that in worldwide competitions like this, beauty contestants should be able to speak the universal language which is English. It will be watched by millions worldwide plus whoever wins will be going around the world for charity work. Smiles can do wonders but not the entire day, right? She still has to talk, right? It will just go to show how the beauty queen can be versatile and intelligent if she knows how to speak English besides her national language...

Anyway, congrats to the winner and to the Venezuelan community...They really produce beauty queens...Some countries make it a career...I just hope they don't forget the real essence of beauty pageants like these...Not just to gain titles, but to contribute in making this world a better place...Not to be a celebrity after a year, but a catalyst of change and charity...